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For weeks now I've been feverishly looking for someone to plug, in a vain attempt to fill the hole I have carved in my soul. Being without the familiarity of my now estranged wife's warmth next to mine each night, I find the only way to sleep is to force myself into a drug induced slumber. I'm not looking for commitment, I had that and here I lay alone. No, what I need a release, something stronger than a drug and more efficient. I may have a way...I work in the industrial district of my city, and I've caught glimpses or heard rumors of women that wander the streets at night. They've been known to mostly traversing between the all night dinners and run down hotels that encircle the district. These businesses, and their very active clientele, almost seem to make a cage around the wealthy fools trapped inside this translucent bubble. Where within women... hookers, hunt the company men that lie within this cluster of factories for the deep pools of cotton they have hidden away in their. I hate myself for being frustrated with this man who does so much for us and that's why I am pissed at myself this morning and unfortunately both the kids and my dear sweet husband had to suffer my ego driven mania this morning.The kids will forget their crazy mom as soon as the get on the bus, too busy with their friends and their days to give a damn about my actions but my husband will take my mood with him and by the time he comes home tonight he'll be apologizing to me and that's just wrong, damn it. Not tonight, no I will not let that man take my stupid egocentric craziness and believe it's his problem. No fucking way.I called my mom and got her to pick up my kids, keep them for the night and deposit them back at school tomorrow and I was going to make sure that my husband was treated like a king tonight and if I had to get on my knees and beg I would get him to forgive me for being such a asshole. I did bathe and dress to appeal to him, but I did not do so to seduce him, no I.
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